Archive for April, 2010

April 23, 2010


The era of the giant question mark

looking back on the past 3 years is a rather dangerous one – but luckily with a relative age comes a relative perspective.  however imperfect, i climb back onto the creative saddle.  use it or lose it!  don’t mess with the mojo.

switching from the conceptual to the [ ____ ] *

* i don’t know how to describe my ‘regular’ or ‘nonacademic’ art – not for lack of concept, but the intent of forming differs enormously.  in honour of the project i contribute to whenever i please, so is my practice, BEDLAMIC.

sometime when i was working in the shawn b murphy studio i drafted up the original ‘or something’ banner out of butcher paper.  scrapping the script, i opted for block letters in black cotton on mixed textile patchwork.

or something banner phase 1

[clicking makes the picture grow to epic proportions]

this is not a thing, it is just a thing. i thought it would be … ‘fun’ or ‘funny’. or something. get it? 100% appropriate.

while i was switching applique colours, i noticed i kept resting my needle on the table or sticking it in a scrap fabric, making me lose the blasted thing more often than not.  i thought, why don’t i have a proper pincushion?  ive made on before but it keeps all my large tapestry needles now and my hack stuffing job makes it kinda crappy.  so right then and there i whipped up this little bad boy.

pin shadowe

this dude’s about 2″x2″, with a small waistband elastic going across allowing me to do this

if you liked it then you should have put a pincushion ring on it


please note the rgb panel acting as curtain in the background.  BITCH OOZES ART GLAMOUR.


speaking of…hands….aren’t they great?  i know this sounds lame and no one really cares about a shout out to my hands but really folks, without them everything would just be an idea in my head.  extra slovenly love to my left hand.  i shouldn’t get into details lest they lead to paranoia but i would be lost without them.  no doubt knitting, crocheting, sewing etc isnt impossible with my mouth or feet but i’ve spent so long already fine tuning my movements that losing them would be an intense experience.

i appreciate their ability to move, to take a beating and still look not too shabby.  even with all the scar tissue and flesh regrowth from the myriad accidents [there’s evidence of one in the right sidebar of this page, if you look close enough] i’ve endured over the years, they’ve kept their falsely narrow aesthetic.  the way my wrists cut into my laptop when i am typing this very sentence is welcome and familiar.  the way the vein pops in heat and dehydration in my left hand – an occurrence directly linked to the placement of the IV needle i had for my appendectomy when i was 10.  the way i obsess over the shape and length of my fingernails, and the way i keep my clippings in my pink sewing kit.  write with my left, cut with my right.  how i learned to crack my middle fingers, the tendons in my wrist are a personal sign of strength.  the inexplicable callouses on my pinkie fingers.  my wedding rings.  the way i grind the skin underneath my nails.  the width of my palms, the bend of my joints buckling under scar tissue.

here’s to you, heather’s hands.  live long and prosper.  make art, make art!

what’s next?
– embellish ‘or something’.  beads, and sequins.  going to town on the sequins.
– ‘musov shoko for judas’ applique
– that felt circle thing.  reqbat knows what i mean.
– finish the first few copies of CALIBRATION [i sure talk a lot about this blasted zine, i should just hurry up and post / list it already
– my mother’s 60th is quickly approaching.  celebrate it with the handmade glory she has worked so hard [or so easy] to make an integral part of my value system.

hopefully it won’t be several weeks until i post again, i want to take some photos of the wares i received from a trade with the lovely vedoluce ! i will wait till the sun is out again, to ease the process.

friday already?  204 am.  i cannot think of a better time to listen to zwan.

April 9, 2010

helminthophobic landscapes and rgb nightmares [for s]

helminthophobic landscapes and rgb nightmares [for s]

and, this marks the end of ilhu’s rgb period.  for now.

helminthophobic landscapes and rgb nightmares [for s]

helminthophobic landscapes and rgb nightmares [for s]

helminthophobic landscapes and rgb nightmares [for s]

helminthophobic landscapes and rgb nightmares [for s]

parallel to this i had been working on an absurd stop motion animation.

have a rough cut.

i thought i would have more to say about all this but i’m still reeling from the xtensive intensive actions that these required.  today is a lovingly quiet day wherein i will get to READ, journal, clear some space on my hdrive, organize my shelves, etc.

neglecting my real life state, i feel like i’m ready to reassume myself.  also, i have found a direct correlation between sitting at the computer, my caffeine intake, and the pain in my jaw and spine.

utah, out.

April 2, 2010

A New Primary Loser

pre show madness for the external masses

cone drone

cone tops

i took photos of the other 2 rgb pieces but they will look so much more interesting when installed.

in other news,
expanding my primary colours so expanding from the gallery will look a little less…..obvious.
you….didn’t think i was just going to ride this one safe, right?


today i saw beautiful losers and i feel like it was one of those art films that i was supposed to feel UGH DAMN ARTISTS LOVING WHAT THEYRE DOING IS SO OBNOXIOUS but it WASNT!  as corny as it sounds, listening to these ‘diy-ers’ made SENSE.  it seems that the art industry is working backwards now – that this system is something that must be immediately sought after before one even has a chance to find something to say.  instead of making our own path and finding our own people, we are more or less coerced into these professional relationships and art taught the conventions without much thought to alternative.  the focus on our learning is of how to get people to notice us, how to make art watered down enough to be accepted by any number of juries or councils.  voiceless voided art is what will be rejected the least, according to the polls.

but who are these people?  where did they come from?  the dreckitudes of our society who make art because they make things that are missing in the world.  the purpose for making is an act in innovation because the things they like to look at don’t quite exist yet.  only after this does the filter kick in – would i show this to someone? yes or no.  make it happen.  it doesn’t take years to make a drawing.  it shouldn’t be a horrendous effort of haggling and begging to make what you feel is real.  just do it.  live off apples, sell your house and sleep in your studio.  what would you sacrifice to make what you want?

you are your own upper hand.  every moment is a ‘make it work’ moment.  if you want your work to be seen and you feel you have something to say, and hold the ability to say it with enough conviction, then you learn to make you own space to go along with it.  either way you’ll be working your ass off – who do you want to take the credit?